Faith

I was asked about my belief in god, I didn’t have much to say over there..
I was asked why you don’t follow the stream; I didn’t have much to say over there either
I was asked are you not afraid of the dark, the evil, the bad, I said no
I was asked what do you want to do in life, I said learn, teach and study
I was asked what would you do when you are unable to do what you wanted to do , I said would like what I get since could not manage to get what I liked
I was asked isn’t that lackadaisical attitude, I said yes only if I did not try too hard to get what I liked
I was asked why are you rebellious, I said only when I am not allowed to fly
I was asked why do you want to fly everywhere, I said there are no boundaries made by your god, if there are they are made by you.
I was asked why do you have silly answers to all questions, I said silly is subjective
I was asked you are just trying to please yourself I said so whats wrong in that isn’t that what I am supposed to do.
I was asked why is it you don’t listen, I said I hear but listen selectively
I was asked if not god what do you believe in , I said me
I was asked why you write so much, I said because I can read it later
I was asked why do you have an answer for everything, I said because there is a question mark everywhere, and that is not put by me, somebody else is writing on my answer sheet.
I was asked why don’t you do this/that, I said because I am doing that/this.
I was asked why do you think you are so intellectual. There are people ten times as intelligent as you.
I said intellect is absolute not relative and I would love to meet those people btw.
I was told I have lost the game, I said I have my own scorecard, and I am the scorekeeper.
I was told you can’t succeed, I said I have in the past and I would in the future
I was told follow the line, I said a line is the shortest path between two points, the big question is which two points
I was asked what are you so proud of I said faith, faith in my abilities and me.

The Unforgiven

New blood joins this earth
And quickly he's subdued
Through constant pained disgrace
The young boy learns their rules

With time the child draws in
This whipping boy done wrong
Deprived of all his thoughts
The young man struggles on and on he's known
A vow unto his own
That never from this day
His will they'll take away

What i've felt
What i've known
Never shined through in what i've shown
Never be
Never see
Won't see what might have been
What i've felt
What i've known
Never shined through in what i've shown
Never free
Never me
So i dub thee UNFORGIVEN

They dedicate their lives
To running all of his
He tries to please then all
This bitter man he is
Throughout his life the same
He's battled constantly
This fight he cannot win
A tired man they see no longer cares
The old man then prepares
To die regretfully
That old man here is me

You labeled me
I'll label you
So i dub thee UNFORGIVEN

A maze

The graph used to have much higher amplitudes, over the years have seen the crests and troughs mellow down, have found very little competition as well, although did not compare too much but there has been a significant difference to let go unnoticed , been there done that now what.. Challenges are hard to find, only ones which are there are self created. Space is important to create those so have been striving to take that wherever and everywhere, writing has been a way of expression because its one way, not much expectation of contribution to make an intelligent conversation because ‘ con’ is with and writing is me with me .

Relationships have been galore, only a few though but long, exit barriers have been there but still exits have been there, the exit route of personal info has seen little traffic .. Words which come have some portrayal but covered with a wrapper to keep stuff enigmatic.. Growth has not suffered though, as spending time with many instead of one has increased, happiness is not sacrificed either, things must happen and have happened. Some posts go to the blog others go to the diary but diaries are so inaccessible and difficult to find and reread.

Music is the best companion and so is the air, falling in love is easy especially when you have fresh air , cool breeze and a wonderful path to take, music is in the ears and in the air as well. Going down the hill is the best thing to do when you are on a bicycle, thoughts have randomness and sometimes no wrappers, we love the wrappers though , that’s why we buy the sweet but we do open it and throw the wrapper away and eat what’s inside .. Reading between the lines and between the words is hence important more than the words themselves, sometimes deep is too deep.

The alphabets are strung into words and into lines and into expressions and into feelings … life has not treated but life has been treated, its been treated good all right, brand building has not been the plan but by virtue of the product the brand has been created , more than the age is how the years have been spent.. As long as the light is seen is what some believe, path is there … if the light goes out... The path is still there but is not treaded by all, so a light has to be created.. if created for one then the path is traversed by one, the best part is to create a light which would make many other follow the same path.

A blog entry not made public is read by few but by focused individuals, the true demand not the latent. A product of experiences is what a person is , a product not sum so every experience has multifold impact … sometimes even after reading an entire entry is unable to get the crux, because there is none, but does lead to rereading and effort of interpretation. But still what is difficult is treated as either juvenile or a piece of literary art. The latter result occurring more often eases the efforts of the creator… The expectation of acclaim is not the motive.. Life is good as it is needs no nods on the path treaded , because no one seen the path beyond it’s a self created light but the path is created for good with illumination all around.. Safe to follow for sure..

Should we abolish Teachers day?

Is this even a question worth asking?

Read a recent article on abolishing teachers day by a certain writer in HT, left a real bad taste in mouth ..

The article mentions of certain sad incidents that have occurred because of certain teachers who decided to use corporal punishment as a means of discipline. The writer takes to the extreme view of abolishing teachers day (http://www.hindustantimes.com/Abolish-Teacher-s-Day/Article1-595321.aspx) what I say is

“A Sample of ten people is not the representative of the entire teacher’s community... definitely there have been sad incidents but not all teachers can be judged on the base of them... Today we are what we are because somebody made us that way it’s definitely not god because he/she just made the clay but somebody gave shape to it .A person is a product of his/her experiences and education is the part of life where we have most of them at an earlier age… I think abolishing a day where we pay respect and gratitude to the people who shape us, our kids and our society is not the best idea ...”

And for the ten bad examples one may quote there would be thousands or lakhs of examples where teachers would have changed lives of their students and enlightened them. But we do not voice when anything good happens but we shout when something bad happens...that’s why you barely find good reviews and if you do find them they be paid reviews lol..

Teaching is synonymous to training which is synonymous to development. Although I am not a big supporter of the idea that a day to be designated to somebody because I believe why should we show gratitude or love or respect on a particular day when you can do that everyday, but then we as humans need a day to halt in our busy lives to understand that somebody/something exists.. It’s important to have Teachers day. They say that this day thingy is a marketing gimmick by these card/gift making companies.
I say so what if you can’t think first of dedicating a day to your loved ones, let them do it… Guess money is more important to them than loved ones are to you, that’s why they came up with the idea first… But its one hell of an idea!!

This comes from me because I have seen both sides of the community. I have had my teaching stints and I am a student still… my request to the media is to be responsible and do not publish such articles, even in the opinion page because such opinions are very extreme and not in the best interests of all..

A Poem that never was and never is and never will be……………

I was trying to write a poem, thinking that the last words had to rhyme.
Decided in the middle, that is not the style of mine.

I dunno about styles, neither have I read much.
I just dot know how to rhyme this poem. Sach

This is going to be in bad shape I know, may not deserve a post as well.
I may just end this now and ring the bell.

Atleast I tried is all I think was important.
I was failing all the time, but I was adamant.

I thought I would put in a story, a thought, and an expression
But all I can do was look was last few words and rhyming was the obsession.

That’s when I thought of an analogy.
When you do not care about the marks and study.

The marks come automatically you learn a lot.
But if it is grades you care about , it is a battle lost before fought.

I write quiet Ok they say, but when it came to a poem,
All I could do was write a few lines and moan.

I used the pronunciation of poem as pome in the last few lines.
Gosh if I could change the pronounciation multiple times.

Rhyming would not be a pain anymore.
Verses would come easy and galore.

I do not know the last few lines I put in, were grammatically right.
But my obsession for rhyming is growing with all its might.

I am writing this in very fast time, maybe this is gonna be read and made fun about .
But I tried my best; I know these few lines are nothing to feel proud.

I keep on going and seriously not once am I am thinking what I am writing
It looks as if a word of war is what I am fighting.

The fingers press the keys which go together in an asynchronous way,
But what do I do, it should rhyme they say.

Passion for writing does not mean, I can write anything ,
But this is my blog, my words , my thing.

A poem is supposed to be short some say,
But while writing this, I kept all thoughts at bay.

Go on Go on is what my fingers say, they do not stop and neither feel tired.
I am hooked on to this I am wired.

While ending any line I think of the next line in advance.
Read ahead give me a chance.

You may think that something good is gonna come.
But till now expectations have all gone bum.

Some words are creative, some are made , some are new.
This poem is a mixture of these words few,

Because when rhyming is an obsession, last word syncing is the craze
The poem quality is going to deteriorate phase by phase.

They called me a gasometer, coz I conjured up words out of nowhere.
A proof is this poem was written in less than 10 mins.. just 1 minute of reading more
to bear .

I presumed I was a writer of the degree of harivansh rai bachan
And I forgot one basic thing to mention.

Its not the rhyme that decides the quality of your writing.
But it’s the thought that the reader would be sighting.

But still without a thought if I have made you read till this line in this poem.
I think as a gasometer , one more level I have grown.

Relativity

Everything is relative in life... Happiness is because of a certain benchmark set by you or the society... Many a time you reach your own benchmarks but still you are not happy because the society’s benchmarks have risen…

Traffic is relative. While there can be answers like no traffic and heavy traffic, but no traffic on the roads would not mean no vehicles except your own but a comparison with what traffic you face daily.

Beauty is relative. A few beautiful people together you would choose the most beautiful amongst them.
Being rich is relative so is being poor. Being educated is relative; being sharp or intelligent is relative.

One point we do achieve moksha is where we have no relativity in our mind. Absolute is the word and if you get what you want you would be happy...

Nothing new about this entry, nothing comical m nothing energetic, but how?? you would have read my other entries compared it to them .. This is relativity... Shun it enjoy what you read not comparing, but reading the blog post...

What the heck... This aint me?!?!?

You know what is the funniest part of a Blog or a diary? When you read an entry say which is one year old... You realize that this is not me... How could I have written this? Although the best part is you have a snapshot of how you were. You always have a point of comparison and a scope for improvement. When you are going somewhere in life you barely realize which direction is that but once you pen it down there is still some scope to look back... because as Steve jobs said” the dots in life can never be joined forward but once you look back at the things you see all has been a plan and whatever you did however miniscule was used and was indeed a part of the plan”


The amazing part I have realized about writing in a blog is you spend time with you. You can talk about yourself and still not be called self obsessed , you can talk for hours and your companion ( That is you ) Will not get bored, and the audience would be very focused , The people who would read your blog would actually want to read it and not just be hearing and not listening as they may do in real physical life( Referred to as RPL from now on .. Funny no I have wasted more words in writing this than I would have wasted in writing Real Physical life maybe ten times lol ). You may get away with some irregularities, you are not afraid of being yourself (Although that should be true in RPL as well).


Now lets move from you and come to me since this is MY BLOG( My Shivani Laugh ( NM GB’s if you are reading would get this..Ms Kumra pls don’t mind you know I created a dot for you as well gives you a reason to look at my blog maybe ten years down the line).I was called a gasometer in college for the fact that I could gas any amount on any topic for as much long and make sense to a few who had their tummies filled with the OH functional group. But recently this capacity has reduced due to reduced time and little scope for imagination... Jobs do kill you but still they are referred to as “what we do for a living “ LOL.. Anyways today I got time and wote this blog post just to have a dot which I could look back maybe a year later and realize this ain’t me...


PS: Gasometer is a term filed under the IPR. Can only be used to refer to a person who can make people high on words, much more than any form of drug or anesthetic can!!